I’m doing a lot of stuff. I’m so ridiculously busy it isn’t even funny. I go to church sometimes six days a week, I work two PRN jobs(around 15 hours a week, last semester around 20), and I’m taking a full class load(which includes physiology. And I’m expected to maintain a certain high standard.)
I’m not saying this to puff myself up. I say this for the opposite purpose, in fact.
I can’t do this.
I’ve stretched myself so thin that I can’t even function. I can barely remember my own name, much less all the intricate functions of the kidney. I don’t have time to sleep. I don’t have time to read books for fun. I don’t have time to spend with my friends.
It is by the power of God alone that I am still functioning, but the thing is that I’m surviving, not thriving.
I don’t want to just lead a bible study, I want to develop relationships with my ladies. I don’t want to just play or sing in a band, I want to lead worship. I don’t want to just make it through school, I want to be the best nurse that I can be.
At the moment I feel like I can’t do all of these things at once, and I’m faced with one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make.
The right choice is to choose God’s will, but what if it isn’t clear which option is God’s will?