Lust vs. Appreciation

The part of the show where Grace talks about nasty guys who stare.

So today I went to the China Buffet with my sister and I couldn’t help but notice that there was an inordinate amount of staring going on. Namely gross older-then-me men staring at, you guessed it, me. It’s like they’ve never seen a tall, thin, curvaceous woman before. Now, I’m not the most beautiful woman in the world. Hell, I don’t even feel right calling myself a woman cuz I’m only 17.99999999 for pete’s sake. But to be honest, I’ve never really looked my age so however young I might be is somewhat moot. Anyways. I’m not the most beautiful woman in the world, but apparently I’m not bad looking. And considering my genes I’m kind of blessed(or doomed) when it comes to superficial looks.

On that note I’d like to talk about men(boys…. brutes?) Why do they insist upon staring at girls? Do I have a big pimple on my nose or something? Naw, of course not. There’s nothing repulsing about my appearance(I don’t think…. I did remember to brush my hair this morning, right?) so that means there are two reasons why this gentleman may or may not be staring.


I am the most beautiful person he has ever seen.

Not likely….


He wants to shag me.

more likely, unfortunately….

Soooo today I found myself getting checked out as the lunch special. Right up there with General’s chicken and Sweet and Sour pork. Greatttt….

Being of a philosophical turn of mind, I started to think of the difference between when a guy looks at you and you feel good and when a guy looks at you and you feel violated.

Personally, when a guy looks at me and I can tell he’s thinking about me in less then appropriate ways, it makes me shudder and start lacing my keys between my fingers. I don’t like being advanced on untowardly. I’m liable to do things you might not like(like making up a completely BS story about how the ring on my left finger is from my fiance who was hit by a car and died earlier this week…. the truth, perhaps, is just as terrifying.). No girl wants to be degraded to the level of lunch….

But there is a glance that girls appreciate, and it takes a certain kind of man to give it. That is, a REAL man. This is the look of appreciation. The look that says “Hmmmmm, a woman that knows how to clothe herself well.”

These looks may have a touch of attraction, but it is only acceptable in men who are around the same age. If an old man looked attracted to me I would be seriously creeped out… But when a nice looking young person looks at me at Super Saver with that surprised “wow, I wasn’t expecting that when I looked up from the freezer section” look, how could I not feel good about myself?

But something to be noted, this first impression can easily be revoked. If there’s the look and that look is followed up by an introduction and then you become clingy and creepy and awkwardy flirty that doesn’t move towards ACTUALLY getting to know each other…. hmmmm, AXED!

Not that I have any experience…. cough cough…

Just the random musings of the teen girl.


I only have 2 years left of teenager-hood. What am I going to call my blog once I turn twenty? input please!

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2 Responses to Lust vs. Appreciation

  1. James says:

    I really loved reading your take on this and your writing style suggests a clean, crisp, nimble mind. Boys/men have a very hard time delivering ‘the look’ you speak of while backing it up with the demeanor you speak of. I think girls grow up dreaming about ‘the one’ perfect specimen with perfect behavior and hold out as long as humanly possible and then start kissing frogs anyway. Or, they like frogs to begin with. Ever heard ‘RESPECT’ by Aretha Franklin. I think that’s what you should call your blog when you are no longer a teen and find out what R-E-S-P-E-C-T meant to her.

    • Gracie says:

      I can definitely understand what you’re saying about men having a hard time delivering “the look” and keeping up with it. And I’m the worst offender when it comes to holding out for prince charming. But I think where a lot of girls go wrong is they(we?) don’t get to know a guy because of a bad first impression. There is something to be said for reserving judgment until you have something more than a glance to base it on. However, I don’t believe in kissing frogs. Call me an idiot, but I believe in soul mates. No need to get desperate ;)

      I have heard that song. Thanks for the suggestion.

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